youngstero: oh my god if i ever became a ghost i would be like “well i am simply beside myself” while i was floating next to my dead body and oh how my ghost friends would laugh
brandnewswastikas: The world is your Kleenex. You can wipe your nose on anything.
brandnewswastikas: For twenty bucks, I’ll mod your iPhone so it looks like a real hand grenade. For ten dollars more I’ll make it so a flame comes out of the top. That means no more lighting your cigs from your friend’s cig. No more having you put your face really close to his every time you want to smoke. No more wondering if kissing him would feel any different than kissing a girl.
assiest: life is full of little surprises, for example: ‘dog food lid’ when read backwards is ‘dildo of god’ truly amazing
Hmm, I'm going to open a window--
kawaii-mcnipples: OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DIRK I’M SO SORRY I WAS JUST TRYING TO GET SOME FRESH AIR
skyward-crossing: omg new leaf is so fun